Sprechen Sie Französisch?
by QuietToxic
Summary: France is somehow, weirdly enough, randomly, simply turned on by Prussia speaking French. And because he's French. he acts on it. FraPru smut!


**While halfway into the story, _Anyplace, Anywhere, Anytime _began playing on the radio. Half German, half English. How fitting. -_-;  
Anyway, a lot of German and French in this story. I happen to speak both languages, but I am by no means perfect at them. Neither am I perfect at English, by the way. (And yes, I know three languages.) (Actually, I know seven, but I'm not telling you that. o3o) French will be written in Italics (see the logic here) and German just... As regular text...**

**ANYWAY! I shall provide translations! They are at the end! [They even have additional notes!] If anything is wrong, please tell me before sending death threats my way, I will fix it. Because, as I said, I know German and French, but they're hard languages for me. French just has difficult grammar and German is a lot like my own language but then it's just this tiny bit different and I screw up. D:**

**Long author's note is long.**

**For now, enjoy the story~!**

* * *

France had a lot of weird habits.

One of them was to walk through the halls of whatever hotel he and the other nations were staying at and listen at each door. He found it very interesting to hear what his fellow nations were up. He'd found a lot of weird things through the years. Discovered some secret relationships, heard funny or intriguing bets and agreements being made, overheard wars starting and friendships beginning.

Today, he was following his routine again. He had gotten a list of who was staying in which room and had started his round. So far the French nation had come across England talking to his imaginary friends, the Italy brothers arguing over whether Germany was allowed to stay in their room or not, Greece surprisingly awake and talking frantically in Greek on the phone, Sweden singing along to rock music loudly, Poland and Luxembourg discussing economics, Spain practicing his speech for tomorrow, and some other things. So far nothing unusual. (Not that France had been expecting anything.)

Currently he was nearing Germany's room. The Frenchman had run into the tall nation before, he was sure the man was not in his room. So the nation was slightly surprised when he heard sounds coming from the room in question. He quickly looked around the hallway and went to listen at the door.  
Inside the room someone was talking in a raspy, harsh voice. The French nation smiled when he recognized it. Prussia. Of course he would be in his brother's room. It's not like he had anywhere else to stay. Question now: who was the ex-nation talking to?

France listened closely. He only heard Prussia, there were no other voices on the room. And it didn't sound like he was talking on the phone. After a while, the Frenchman could finally hear what his friend was saying.

'_Je suis, tu es, il est, nous avons... _Nein_, nous sommes. Nous sommes, vous êtes, ils... Ils... _Verdammt! Was war es?' And then some grumbles before Prussia finally found _ils sont_. France blinked. The older German brother was speaking French. Very badly, and his accent hurt the Frenchman's ears, but he was speaking French nonetheless. France kept listening as Prussia continued in his broken French.

'_Je m'appelle Gilbert et j'ai _AWESOME. Heh.' There was a minute of silence. 'NEIN! SCHEISSE! _JE _SUIS AWESOME!'

France snickered, he found it adorable that his friend was trying to learn his language so hard. Most European nations had a - if not very basic - grasp of French, because it had been a very important language in the past, but Prussia had never bothered to learn it. Until now, apparently. Why, France didn't know, but he couldn't say he disliked it. His friend's raspy voice added a whole new dimension to the language of love, and it was not unpleasant. Actually, it sounded very good with it, if not for the horrible German accent.

'Okay, jetzt muss ich versuchen... Ah ja. _Je suis _awesome! _J'habite en Allemagne. J'ai un sœur. Il m'appelle Ludw-_ Augenblick mal! Das war falsch!' He laughed loudly, drowning out France's own snort. Prussia had just claimed Germany was his sister. Not only that, his grammar was wrong, too. Still the Frenchman couldn't help but find it some sort of attractive, the hoarse voice speaking his language - even the accent was growing on him as he continued to listen. Prussia talked about himself in short, easy sentences, probably from some sort of text book.

It was nothing, really. France was around people talking French all the time. But somehow he was extremely turned on by Prussia butchering his language. It must've been the voice. (He'd always found the huskiness sort of sexy.) The Frenchman leaned against the door, licking his lips and swallowing hard. What was a man to do?  
Any ordinary man would probably have walked away and try to calm himself. But he was not any ordinary man. He was France. Nation of love. Master of seduction. In "possession" of the most beautiful language in the world, currently being spoken by a hot ex-nation with an oh-so-sexy voice. And being France, he (with his knowledge of how to sneak into houses and hotel rooms) opened the door and walked inside.

He made as little sound as possible. Prussia was sitting in a large chair by the window. His back was facing France, giving the latter the opportunity of sneaking up on the albino.  
'_Ma couleur préférée est -_ das möchte doch niemand wissen! Psh, Quatsch. _J'aimez - non, j'aime bien la bière et aussi -_ AAAAAAH GODDAMMIT FRANCIS GET OFF OF ME!'

France just smiled at the man he'd just jumped onto. '_Surprise_!'

'Not a good surprise, man! You could've at least brought me beer or someth-'

He was cut off when France's lips collided with his own, pushing him back in the chair. France was practically straddling the ex-nation, his knees on either side of the man's legs. Prussia reciprocated the kiss at first, but then shoved the Frenchman off, along with his text book, which hit the ground with a _thud._

'What are you DOING?'

'_Ah, Gilbert. S'il te plaît, continuez à parler français. Je t'en prie__._'

'Was sagst du denn?'

'You must not stop speaking French, _mon ami_!' France said frantically, holding Prussia's shirt.

'Oh god, no,' Prussia said, rolling his eyes. 'Don't tell me you're turned on by it, freaky bastard.'

'I would be lying.' He clutched the other's clothing dramatically and brought his lips to the man's ear. '_Continuez._'

'You're such a drama queen, Francis,' Prussia quipped. '_Mais bien sûr, si tu veux._'

'_Oui,_' France breathed, eyes wide.

'On one condition.'

'Hm?'

'_You_ speak German.' Prussia smirked. France knew his friend was aware that he hated the man's brother's language with a passion. They'd had quite a lot of pointless fights over it in the past. The blond looked up at him with his eyebrows raised and his lips slightly parted.

'Okay.' Without any warning, the Frenchman closed the distance between them again. The stubble on his chin grazed Prussia's cheek as he pushed his tongue between the man's lips. Prussia tangled his hands in France's hair and moaned. The men pulled away after a long time, but not for long. France pressed his body closer to Prussia and their lips connected again. The Frenchman ground his hips against Prussia's torso, making his shirt ride up and reveal some of the man's pale skin. Not that any of them noticed.

Prussia cupped France's face, pulling him closer, as France placed both hands on the back of the chair to steady himself. They continued exchanging heated kisses like that for a while. Then Prussia's hands strayed from France's face to fumble with the buttons on the man's dress shirt. France unbuttoned the garment himself as he removed his lips from the albino's and began trailing kisses down his neck, hungrily.

He couldn't believe he was so turned by Prussia merely speaking French, but the straining in his slacks told him the truth.

'Gilbert, sprich,' the Frenchman breathed, before returning to his activities at the nape of the man's neck. He kissed it, pushing away the fabric of his friend's black shirt.

'Mein Gott - _mon dieu, Francis. N'arretez pas._' The ex-nation lifted his shirt over his head and reached for France's shirt and the tank top underneath. The clothing came off swiftly. The men's bare upper bodies pressed together. They were panting heavily from their kissing. _  
_

'Ich gehe... Ich... Ah _merde_. Ich spreche kein Deutsch, du weißt das!'

'Hm. I can see why you were so turned on by me speaking French. Your German is fucking hot.'

'Gilbert! French!'

'Fuck the French.'

'I like the sound of that, but ah-!' The Frenchman got distracted by his friend placing his lips on his neck and sucking it. He groaned and ground his hips on Prussia's crotch, digging his knees into the cushions of the chair. Prussia held onto his waist tightly. France threw his head back and felt the albino move downwards, kissing his collarbone before moving on to his nipples.

He held the younger male's shoulders, held his neck, tangled his hands in the ex-nation hair.

'_Francis. J'ai décidé de continuer à, _err_, parler français. Si tu parle allemand.'_

France practically _felt_ his erection growing when Prussia started speaking his language again. 'Ja. Gut. Nicht... Stoppen? Stoppen? That's right, isn't it?'

Prussia hummed. The the sound vibrated through France's chest pleasantly. The Frenchman let go of his friend's shoulders and crawled off the chair.

'Hey, what are - _qu'est-ce que tu fais?'_

France didn't answer. He knelt down in front of the chair and followed the small trail of light hair that went down from Prussia's navel with his index finger. The albino made a small sound that could have been a laugh and France made to unzip his jeans. As the clothing fell down, both men heard the door to the hotel suite being opened and closed. They looked at each other as footsteps shuffled into the room. Not far, just a meter or two.

'Bruder,' Germany's voice called out, 'bist du da?'

Of course, they realized. Germany couldn't see them because of the large chair. France smiled at Prussia seductively (well, he always smiled like that) and answered: 'Ja Ludwig, er ist hier~!' And he yanked down Prussia's underwear. The man emitted a loud moan. France could see his brother blushing around the chair and he smirked. Prussia pushed back in the chair and closed his eyes.

'_Frère, _du _- tu dois partir - _AH MEIN GO - _DIEU, Francis!__'_

The Frenchman had closed his fingers around Prussia's member and jerked hard. The albino gripped the armrests of the chair tightly and grunted. Germany, meanwhile, seemed unable to move. He just stood there in the doorway with his hand clasped over his mouth. France shuffled sideways so the man could see him, but made sure his hand didn't leave Prussia.

'Ludwig, you can join if you want to. Aber nur, wenn du Französisch sprichst.' He winked.

The German looked at him from the corner of his eye and shook his head in disbelief. He was breathing hard through his nose. One hand strayed to his crotch subconsciously as he muttered something along the lines of 'I must try to get another room maybe Italy will let me share his o shit Romano will be there maybe I can ask Austria o no I'll have to clean up I will go to the bathroom now'.

France chuckled when the door slammed shut behind the nation and turned his full attention back to Prussia and the wonderful sounds he made. The ex-nation was trying to encourage him in French while at the same time wanting to scold him for scaring his little brother (he _never _scared Germany, a-hem) in German. It sounded weird, but very good at the same time. France used both hands to massage Prussia's cock and kissed his inner thighs lightly. Then he slowly went up and kissed the head of the man's member, before licking it teasingly.

'_Ah, Francis, je m-me souviens pourquoi tu la nation d-du amour es,' _Prussia said, in a voice huskier than usual.

The Frenchman smiled slightly at the (grammatically wrong) compliment and slid his lips around Prussia's cock, taking the head into his mouth and flicking it with his tongue. He earned a long, airy moan. The man's own dress pants were annoyingly tight by now and he could feel himself leaking. He hadn't been this aroused in a long time, and not by Prussia in an even longer time. Maybe he should convince more people into speaking French for him. The man bobbed his head up and down, scraping his teeth along Prussia's member and sucking softly.

Prussia cried out through gritted teeth and bucked into France's mouth. France, meanwhile, unbuttoned his own pants and slid them down with one hand to get some more space. There was a wet spot on the front of his boxers from precum. France's continued sucking Prussia as the man's cries became more frantic and his movements became more rigid. As he was about to come, France clasped his hand tightly around the base of the ex-nation's cock. Prussia cried out loudly in frustration and a string of curses in mixed languages was directed at France, who, for his part, just continued sucking and licking.

His hand was working as a cock ring, preventing the other from coming until he wanted him to. Prussia kicked out at the Frenchman and tried to pull away from his touch. His member was a dark red it'd never been before. France removed his mouth and used his hand to _torture _the German even more as he said: 'Sprich Französisch, und vielleicht...'

'HOW CAN I FUCKING SPEAK FRENCH NOW?'

France fondled the man's tight balls. He knew it hurt, but his friend would be rewarded. Greatly.

_'Je te déteste maintenant, tu sais?'_ the ex-nation asked breathlessly. _'Tu sais, Francis?'_

He tugged Prussia member once more and let go. The German arched his back and cried out so loudly that the whole hotel could probably hear it. He dirtied the chair and himself with his load of cum before sinking down onto the cushions, exhausted. He was covered in sweat and completely out of breath. His cheeks were stained with tears and his crimson eyes were hazy.

'Scheiße, Francis,' Prussia choked out. 'I think "awesome" wouldn't even cover how that felt.'

France could only nod in response. He pushed some hair out of his face and looked up at his friend, swallowing hard. The German looked back at him and raised his eyebrows in understanding. He lifted himself from the chair with difficulty and staggered over to a door, motioning for France to follow. The blond hobbled after him.

The door turned out to lead to the bathroom. It was not a fancy bathroom; a sink, a toilet and a shower cabin with old-fashioned curtains. Prussia walked over to the shower shakily and turned it on. He jumped underneath it as soon as the water had warmed. His eyes told France to join him, he was uncharacteristically quiet otherwise. The Frenchman disposed of his underwear and stepped into the shower with his friend. Prussia smiled contentedly and leaned over to kiss him. The two men wrapped their arms around each other and clung together. When they parted, Prussia smirked at France.

'_Je présume que je réponds maintenant?'_

France didn't want Prussia to "respond". He didn't want to be jacked off or given a blowjob. He wanted Prussia. And he'd have him.

'Vielleicht,' he answered, 'es hängt davon ab, wie du das meinst.' The Frenchman looked his friend in the eye through the shower and a curtain of clingy blond hair. 'Ich will dich, Gilbert.' He felt Prussia breathing in as he realized just what France was asking of him. The albino opened his mouth, as if to say something, but nothing came. Instead he pulled the other closer and started kissing him again.

The shower made the kiss not only wetter, but also hotter. The men's tongues explored each other's mouths as Prussia grabbed one of France's hands and slid it down his wet body, to his ass. France smiled into the kiss and grabbed the butt, pulling Prussia closer and rubbing their erections together harshly. After a while, the Frenchman reached out blindly and shut off the water. Then he turned his friend around so the man was facing the wall. He licked up some water drops sliding down his body and saw Prussia shiver. He parted the man's butt cheeks and kissed the space between them, darting out his tongue to touch the man's hole - they were in a shower, he was as clean as could be.

Prussia moaned when France's tongue worked its way into his body, planting his forearms onto the wall and leaning on them with his head. France swirled his tongue around expertly for a while, then removed himself and plunged into his friend with his right thumb. He used the rest of his fingers to hold away the butt cheek. Prussia's muscles tightened around the intrusion and the man's arms shifted on the wall involuntarily; he almost fell. Now the Frenchman inserted his other thumb as well and began stretching, moving them away from each other.

Prussia emitted incoherent sounds in (at least three) different languages, but it all turned into German when France pushed his tongue in again, before standing up and quickly and somewhat unexpectedly pushing in the head of his cock. He didn't hesitate to push in further, panting heavily as he finally got what he wanted. The water mixed with saliva worked as an excellent lube.

'Ah _merde, Gilbert. C'est magnifique. _Wunderbar. Awesome. Whatever you may say,' the nation breathed, holding the German's hips for support.

'Yeah, yeah.' Prussia looked over his shoulder through half-lidded eyes. He, too, was trying to catch his breath. 'Fucking MOVE.'

France didn't need to be told twice. He moved in and out of Prussia quickly, then slower, then quicker again. He moved his hips around until his friend cried out violently and he knew he'd found that particular spot. He hit the bundle of nerves again, and again. He shut his eyes as he could feel his orgasm nearing and doubled over when it came, releasing himself into Prussia with a cry. He couldn't keep moving anymore, so he removed himself from Prussia and plummeted to his knees to work his tongue again, also using his hands to jerk the man's cock this time. It was not long before the albino came too. His feet slipped away from under him and he fell onto his knees as well.

France embraced the German from behind, nuzzling his neck. They sat on the bathroom floor in silence for a while. Then Prussia reached up and turned on the shower again, letting the hot jets warm their bodies. He shuffled around and sat down on his butt in front of France, who smiled at him.

'Well, Gilbert,' the Frenchman said with a wink, 'if you ever need help with French, you know you can always ask me.'

'If you need help with German, contact my bruder. It would be awesome to see what happens then.'

France chuckled. That would be interesting.

'_Et après,' _Prussia smirked '_je crois que j'étudiai le hongrois.' _

* * *

**TRANSLATIONS!**

_'Je suis, tu es, il est, nous avons..._Nein_, nous sommes. Nous sommes, vous êtes, ils... __Ils..._Verdammt! Was war es?' And then some grumbles before Prussia finally found _ils sont_. ~ '_I am, you are, he is, we have..._No, _we are. We are, you are _**[this is either the plural form or a polite way of saying you (but you probably knew** **that)]**, _they... They..._Damn! What was it?' And then some grumbles before Prussia finally found _they are._

_'Je m'appelle Gilbert et j'ai _AWESOME_.' __~ 'My name is _**[I call myself, literally] **_Gilbert and I have _AWESOME.'

_'_NEIN! SCHEISSE! _JE _SUIS AWESOME!_' ~ _'NO! SHIT! _I _AM AWESOME!'

'Okay, jetzt muss ich versuchen... Ah ja. _Je suis _awesome! _J'habite en Allemagne. __J'ai un sœur. Il m'appelle Ludw-_ Augenblick mal! Das war falsch!' ~ 'Okay, now I have to try... Ah yes. _I am _awesome! _I live in Germany. I have a sister. _**[Plus, _un _is the wrong article for _sœur_. It should be _une._]** _He calls me Ludw- _Wait a minute! That was wrong!'

'_Ma couleur préférée est -_ das möchte doch niemand wissen! Psh, Quatsch. _J'aimez - non, j'aime bien la bière et aussi -_' ~ '_My favourite colour is - _nobody wants to know that! Psh, rubbish. _I love _**[using the _vous _form]** _- no, I really like beer and also -_'

'_Surprise!' ~_'_Surprise!_' **(Wow. That one was really hard.)**

'_Ah, Gilbert. S'il te plaît, continuez à parler français. __Je t'en prie._' ~ '_No, Gilbert. Please, keep talking French. I beg you._' **(Also, _Gilbert_ said with a French accent is sooooooooooo-!)**

'Was sagst du denn?' ~ 'What are you saying?

'_Mon ami._' ~ '_My friend._' **(You probably knew this one. ;))**

'_Continuez.' ~ 'Continue.' _**(Wow. This one was also really hard.)**

'_Mais bien sûr, si tu veux._' ~ '_But sure, if you want to_.'

'_Oui.' ~ 'Yes._' **(I said I'd give you translations, now I'll give you translations. :D)**

'Gilbert, sprich,' ~ 'Gilbert, talk.'

'Mein Gott - _mon dieu, Francis. __N'arretez pas._' ~ 'My god - _my god, Francis. __Do not stop._'

'Ich gehe... Ich... Ah _merde_. Ich spreche kein Deutsch, du weißt das!' ~ 'I'm going to... I... Ah _shit. _I don't speak German, you know that!'

'_Francis. J'ai décidé de continuer à, _err_, parler français. Si tu parle allemand.'_ ~ '_Francis. __I have decided to keep, _err_, speaking French. If you speak German.'_

_'_Ja. Gut. Nicht... Stoppen? Stoppen?' ~ 'Yes. Alright. Don't... Stop? Stop?'

_'Qu'est-ce que tu fais?'_ ~ '_What are you doing?'_

'Bruder, bist du da?' ~ 'Brother, are you there?'

'Ja Ludwig, er ist hier~!' ~ 'Yes Ludwig, he is here~!'

'_Frère,_du _- tu dois partir - _AH MEIN GO - _DIEU, Francis!' __~ 'Brother,_you - _you have to leave - _AH MY GO - _GOD, Francis!'_

_'_Aber nur, wenn du Französisch sprichst.' ~ 'But only if you speak French.'

'_Ah, Francis, je m-me souviens pourquoi tu la nation d-du amour es.' __~ 'Ah Francis, I remember why you the nation o-of love are._ **[It should be _je me souviens pourquoi tu es la nation de l'amour. _I used the German order of words: Ich erinnere mich, warum du die Nation der Liebe bist.]**

'Sprich Französisch, und vielleicht...' ~ 'Speak French, and maybe...'

_'Je te déteste maintenant, tu sais? __Tu sais, Francis?' ~ 'I hate you right now, you know that? Do you know that, Francis?'_

'Scheiße, Francis.' ~ 'Shit, Francis.' **(Wow. Hard. Have I ever mentioned that I love the name Francis? Because I do.)**

'_Je présume que je réponds maintenant?' ~ 'I presume that I respond now?'_

'Vielleicht. Es hängt davon ab, wie du das meinst.' ~ 'Maybe. It depends on how you mean that.'

'Ich will dich, Gilbert.' ~ 'I want you, Gilbert.'

'Ah _merde, Gilbert. C'est magnifique. _Wunderbar.' ~ 'Ah _shit, Gilbert. It is magnificent. _Wonderful.'

'_Et__après, je crois que j'étudiai le hongrois.' __~ 'And I think I will study Hungarian after that.'_

**Oh Prussia, you cheeky man. I hate PruHun.  
I had something else to saaaaaaay, but I forgooooot. Other than I am not completely satisfied with this oneshot. D:**

**Anyway! Bye! Don't forget to review!**


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